Fingerprint and DNA Testing for Employees

Fingerprint and DNA testing: Would you let your employer fingerprint you and take your DNA?

Of course not.

You are wrong, it is about to be implemented at a prominent Brisbane Hospital. Fingerprinting that is.

George Orwell 1984 eat your heart out, Pink Floyd will need to release ‘Another Brick in the Wall-Part 4’. This goes well beyond ‘we don’t need any education.

Where are the Unions? (oh that’s right they are all down at the Royal Commission).

But is it lawful?

The frightening thing is that we do not know – so we turned it over to our Special Counsel, Mr. Sara to investigate.

The first task is to decide whether this is a common law or equity problem. What? Please explain.

Common Lawyers and Equity Lawyers have been rivals since the great Fusion Fallacy. That started in the 15^th Century and was finally settled in Australia as late as 1970.

COMMON LAWYERS

Common Lawyers are like the phrase says your garden variety lawyers. They slug it out in the criminal courts, draft your will, do your divorce, Personal Injury claims and so on. They are the engine room of the legal profession. They complain about getting their 10 CLE (Continuing Legal Education) points a year but are not afraid to attend these lectures at midday in the hot Queensland Sun.

Outside of the law they play sport, drink beer, go surfing, and are usually on their second or third marriage. Jeans and T-shirts are the closest they get to sartorial elegance.

Equity Lawyers are anything but garden variety. They are not even on their first marriage and only attend their CLE’s in the early evening so these precious dears don’t break a sweat in the hot sun. They carry clutch purses, wear cravats and drink chamomile tea in their daily laden offices. They cried for joy when Queen’s Counsel was re-introduced in Queensland (dabbing their eyes with their lacy handkerchiefs). When the next Monarch reigns they will become King’s Counsel and like Humpty Dumpty would love to hang out with the King’s men. If they play sport, unlikely, it is only Badminton to exercise the wrist.

EQUITY LAWYERS

Common lawyers are terrified of Equity Lawyers. Equity Lawyers are the true legal zealots, they are brought in only at the last minute in the toughest cases. They spell doom for you if they happen to be on the other side. They do not even know where the Magistrates and District Courts are, much less than attend them (particularly during daylight hours).

Equity Lawyers are superior, where the rules of equity will always prevail over the common law in the event of a conflict: Judicature Act 1873 (IMP).

So getting back to the issue after a brief dalliance with the Fusion Fallacy, and a tongue-in-cheek jibe at our Equity Colleagues, we can assure you this is an equity problem.

DNA Testing for Employees

It is a problem, the issues are endless:

• The employer is not the government, and certainly not Police, where do they derive this power?
• What happens when the employee moves on – are these fingerprints retained?
• What happens if these fingerprints fall into the wrong hands?
• Ok there are drugs and vulnerable patients in hospitals – how are the fingerprints going to enhance what is already a secure environment?
• Do we stop at Fingerprints? DNA testing is far more unique to the individual and far more accurate. A simple Buccal (cheek) swab with a cotton bud will yield this information in less than 30 seconds.
• What if a workplace rival obtains your fingerprints and leaves them at a crime scene.

This is frightening stuff.

At Aylward Game we will strenuously defend your rights even though we are mere Common Lawyers.  If it is beyond us we have the means to contact Equity Lawyers (in the early evening only).

KEEPING YOU AHEAD OF THE GAME

Contact
United Service Club
Level 4, 183 Wickham Terrace, Brisbane QLD 4001

Free: 1800 217 217
Phone: 07 3236 0001
Fax: 07 3236 0005
Email: mail@aylwardgame.com.au